Wedding Dress Dilemmas

I'm having a few dilemmas with the dress!  

I met with a dressmaker the other day and it seems that I am so picky with my lace that she thinks I have almost no chance of finding lace that I like that's also in my price range.  Apparently I have very expensive taste!  So... at her suggestion I am visiting all of the local fabric stores, and I'll do a trip to the downtown fabric district, but I might have to re-think my original dress concept, and not have a dress made entirely of lace.

To review, the below is basically my dream dress.  It's the "Melissa" by Monique Lhuillier.  I would need alterations however to give it a more open neck and elbow length "flutter" sleeves).  It costs $4,800.  Plus alterations.  So it's basically not an option!!

I'm obsessed with the lace used for the "Melissa" dress and have been trying to track it down but it seems as though it might be custom lace designed by and made exclusively for Monique (possibly by a company called Solstice), and even if I could find it, it's unlikely I could afford enough of it to make an entire dress.  So that's out!

Driving past Les Habitudes (on Robinson next to the Ivy) I spotted a very sweet little bolero made from a very soft what I'm calling Venice Lace (but I'm not totally sure that's what it is) with layered chiffon sleeves.  I tried it on and it actually looked lovely, very simple and elegant but not too bridal-y.. but it's $1,400, and I'd want the sleeves longer, and they don't think the designer in Paris would be very accommodating about that!  Did I mention it's $1,400?!

I go back to the dressmaker to inspect some more lace samples she got in that were affordable, but unfortunately I didn't like, and I asked about Venice Lace (although again, not really sure what it is and my dressmaker calls it "guipure" though I think that's something else?).  Turns out it's even more expensive and hard to get (it's all from France or Italy, of course).  BUT that I might be able to find enough at a reasonable price to make a little bolero.  She just can't help me find it.  Ahh!!!

So, my current thought, what about the J Crew Genevieve dress, pictured below, with a little lace bolero over it, made of either the Monique Lhuillier lace or Venice lace that I find myself?  It's completely different from the original idea, but I kind of like the idea of a big full dress, you do only get one day to wear one!!   And it has pockets!  I love a dress with pockets!

Here is the J Crew dress below, it's unfortunately one of their more expensive ones, AND you can only buy it online!  But I'm thinking of giving it a go, providing I can return it, as I do need to sort it out soon in order to avoid rush alteration fees down the track.  My gosh they make this wedding stuff unnecessarily expensive, stressful and complicated!!!

This week I'm also going to visit a famous store called Paris 1900 in Santa Monica just in case they have a fabulous vintage or vintage inspired wedding dress that I love.  All of this is making me realize just how picky I am.  Very very picky!

Wish me luck and let me know what you think!